Burnout

In January of this year, I was in pretty big trouble. I’d been close to an all-out mental collapse for a while, something constantly held at bay by the various theatre and independent film projects I’d become involved in. Arguably the most exciting of these was the debut short by established Royal Court Theatre playwright (and Marlowe Writers Room mentor) Leo Butler: the part was hilariously absurd, amazingly well-written and an offer I couldn’t refuse. The prospect of filming it and the filming itself - with my good friend, the actress Sangeeta Sharma - took care of December almost entirely.

Then I started to nosedive a bit.

While trying quite frantically to write as many decent books and short stories as I could manage, I was actually hiding out at the Minster Playhouse and embroiling myself in a Christmas production of The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe to distract myself from the very real possibility that my well had quite literally run dry.

The production itself was a mixed bag: an amazing cast and a great play with a superb director, but we all got sick as the show opened and by the day of the final performance, I had lost my voice entirely and had to be prompted (not because I’d forgotten the line but because I physically couldn’t deliver it). Christmas followed, and in my usual slump after all the eating, drinking and socialising, I decided that 2026 was going to be the year I entered every major competition possible and the year I would publish at least two more books.

There was just one problem: confidence.

The Shinbone Shadowhunter is probably the best book I have ever written. It’s currently the title that I point people towards if they want to get a feel for The Illmoor Chronicles and why it did so well (albeit in a short-lived capacity) for Disney, Sony, Hodder and the BBC. If you’ve never read my books before and you want to give them a try, my advice is always the same: start with either Curse of the Kingslayer (2023) or The Shinbone Shadowhunter (2024), as they both contain elements of my best work.

In any case, 2026 started badly. As my 48th birthday approached, I was more down than usual, drinking more heavily than I had been previously and generally wasting more and more time with my head buried in books I’d already read and games I’d already played. I was spending entire evenings playing solo board games like Horrified or Reign of Cthulhu with a glass of whiskey and high-strength coffee that kept me awake all night.

Fortunately, my wife and a good friend (Fiona Englund) stepped in and persuaded me to go along to an audition for Carry on Camping, a local production based on one of the most famous comedy film series of the 60s (and beyond). I ended up joining an absolutely amazing team of people, including a co-director who has been one of my favourite stage actors for a very long time. Together, this epic bunch of folks pretty much saved the first part of my year (you can read all about the production HERE).

However, it’s now Monday, 8th June, 2026: the show was a roaring success but is now over, and I’m forced to face what’s actually on the cards for me this year. The fact is that I did work exceptionally hard in the first few months of 2026, and I did write four short stories, none of which I’m currently able to talk about as they’re all actively entered in some of the biggest competitions in the country. I have high hopes for them.

I’m also working very tentatively on an outline for a new Illmoor book…but it’s early days.

I’m still drinking. I’m still spending far too much time fishing in Fallout 76…

…but I am back…and I am trying.